20120902
♥ Change is the only constant.
Suddenly, my life changes. I am quite at a loss right now honestly.
Two major parts of my life have disappeared - CAC and my sister.
Because of FYP and my continuously falling GPA, I decided to devote more time to my studies this year. SWC is the only project which I am interested in and which accommodates well into my FYP schedule. I have already decided way beforehand that it's either SWC or nothing.
But when I didn't manage to get into SWC, it suddenly struck me that I will be out of CAC already, assuming that I go according to my plans of SWC or nothing. And then I pondered and thought when I know that certain other projects still have vacancies. But the commitment level they required was too much for me to give.
So, people asked me why no LSA (Long Service Award)?!?! Well, honestly, I also expected myself to stay throughout and get LSA LOL. In fact, I also expected quite a few others to do so as well, but expectations aren't reality. For those both who are in and outside of CAC, I think they knew I really spent quite a lot of time on CAC stuff, be it real work or casual outings. But I don't think I need a LSA to prove my dedication, commitment or love for this. Of course it's good to feel appreciated lol.
Whatever it is, I have decided to retire from this already. Stepping out (probably not fully) might not exactly be a bad thing too. But I definitely know that these 2 years have been well spent, and I am thankful for the friendships I have made. :) Just that, I feel a bit at a loss and not too sure how to react being CCA-less.
And also, my sister has just flew off for her overseas exchange cum internship few hours ago. Sent her off at the airport in the wee hours and only reached back home at around 6am. I believe she is still on the plane right now.
I cried on the car ride home yesterday. 6 months is a really long period of time, and I'm not too sure how I cope with this. To be exact, it's 7 months because she will be travelling after her internship. The longest time I have been separated from my sister was 1 week?! When I was in KL for badminton training for a week. Other than that and some camps once in a year, we have never been separated. Although she can get a bit irritating at times.
Waking up to an empty bed today. This house suddenly feels so empty. I am feeling so restless and tired. Everything seems to be the same, except that my wardrobe looks emptier with half of the clothes taken away from me.
Only apart for 8 hours and I am missing you already. Juan, I love you. <3 care="care" p="p" take="take">
