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20100529
♥ Something more.
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Something is missing. I need something more. But I don't know what.

I don't feel like I'm living a meaningful/purposeful life. When I was studying, I told myself, okay I MUST study so that I can get good grades, and then I'll have the right to talk about a meaningful life. And now that I've gotten decent enough grades, gotten into a course I've chosen, then what's next?

I don't feel like I'm leading life the way I want it. But I told myself, how else can Alevel graduates live a purposeful life besides those who are relief teaching & hence, sort of making a difference in people's lives? But after my graduation, what else will I do? I think I've to consider all these. I need a career that makes a difference to society/at least someone. I need to bring a smile to people. I need something more than just hiding in my own room, doing my own things, unless of course all these lead to the greater good of Mankind.

Not trying to be some famous scientist or life-saving doctor or something like that. Even something small, but not something rather meaningless like receptionist. (sorry maybe I'm just biased against receptionists now.) Actually I really hate how I've no goals in life. With friends venturing into engineering, and me wanting to take up environmental engineering but have no guts to do so, because I'm just not too sure if that is what I wanted.

I will still stick to my dream of a wedding planner, because then I'll be someone who witnesses people's joy, and in return, brings joy to them as well.

Aiyah, how come the grass is always greener at the other side? Whatever options I have, seems to always pale in comparison to others', haha.

P.S. Can you see the colour difference in the photo?